I bit the bullet and cleaned off my dresser today. You know it’s a job when the first thing I did was grab a trash bag. Not just any trash bag, but a 42 gallon contractor’s bag. Okay, so L was working on her side of the room, too, but you get the idea. My dresser is this long, low thing that I’ve always disliked. The drawers aren’t easy to pull out. Heck, they don’t have handles. It’s one of those you reach under the drawer and grab a groove and pull. Looks smooth but my hands hate it.
Every time I “clean” it, I keep putting the same crap back. The concept or “everything in its place and a place for everything” doesn’t work in this house. Yet.
Today I decided that if it didn’t have a place and if it didn’t have a place ’cause I’d never use it again or whatever, then I didn’t need to keep it.
You know you’re a lesbian when…
– you find a pack of u-joint fasteners. And then find another.
– you find 3 baseballs. And you don’t play baseball. You stink at it.
– you find a plethora of unmatched socks
– you find a long screwdriver, a spark plug, and a AAA battery wrapped together with a rubber band as if they were to serve a purpose
– you see no problem with finding the three items together but it bothers you that you can’t remember what they were for
– you are more shocked to find only two cards, the Ace of Clubs and the 2 of Spades. The rest of the deck is missing.
– you do, however, find the entire set of the Queens Rule deck (anyone remember those?)
– you find a promotional card from Karin Kallmaker with her kiss on it.
– you find another promotional doohickey (an LED light with a compass and whistle!) from a now defunct online bookstore and for a brief, every so brief moment, you are torn as to which one you are happiest to find
– you chuck the LED light with compass and whistle because while the battery will die, the kiss never will
– your girlfriend claims the other LED light with compass and whistle because she thinks it is cool and that your butch fascination with KK is both weird and cute at the same time
– you find another promotional card from Lynn Ames and you stand it up next to the one with the kiss
– you find more unmatched socks
– you find yet more promotional doohickeys but none are as cool nor have kisses so they get chucked
– you wonder if the unmatched socks are like mutt dogs that have continued to interbreed to the point a match will never happen again
I can see the top of my dresser, which is amazing. I’ve cleaned out all but three of the drawers. Once they are cleaned out, the dresser is going bye-bye and will be replaced by something more accessible.